Official Home of the New Order of Highsec
Yesterday, we saw the burden of alliance leadership.
Voluminous unsolicited correspondence.
Oh boy…
Thanks for the intel.
I get lot of inquiries.
It’s not a cult. We are a congregational Fellowship of Friendos.
Next time, we’ll talk about sexual harassment in EvE Online.
That’s right.
That’s not gonna happen.
Like wtf.
Yep, that’s an antiganker.
Oh, hey there.
I guess it’s mailtime.
Some miners are not upset.
They are quite calm.
Some miners roleplay as notaminers.
No mining in Delve!
That’s right.
This Orca had plenty of ‘no’ warning…
It was all a setup! The miner exposed CCP’s evil ways.
I’m the most upvoted person in EvE forum history.
Unlike some people, I actually play EvE Online.
I get way too much email (unlike James, I don’t have a cute secretary).
It is funny tho.
A mining sniper, and not even his first time…
Bro has been doing that longer than I’ve played.
Send me one billion isk, buy 5 get one free.
Boy, I got so much game up in here.
Wow, just wow.
I can’t wait to hear more.
That’s right.
I won’t tolerate griefing in my alliance.
Sure thing, little buddy.
Ah, but I’m also cute.
That’s my isk/hr.
Hey, I’m having fun)
Welcome to Highsec.
We can play EvE Online together.
Let’s send those miners to otherwhere!
That’s right, go on, git.
I’m a real Space Ganger now.
Tunnel snakes don’t scare us.
I run five successful alliances.
We are all one team…
…spoonfeeding content to the regular workingpleb.
They love it.
Cheerzah brav.
Nobody likes a loley miner.
Loleylol!
Gotta catch em all, and then do it again.
There are a lot of alts.
CCP thought these were new players.
Each character imbued with a unique personality.
The primary purpose of the 1000+ alts we applied into MRMNG was to send in-game corp mails.
Our alts adopted various personas. They would surface posing as concerned linemembers, newly promoted corp officers, Agents of the New Order, Metallica enthusiasts, Hapsburg princesses, marine biologists, Ryan Reynolds, chronically ill teenagers, and so on. Over 90000 corp mails were sent over the course of the campaign, which ensured uninterrupted dialogue with the other 2000 members of Mission Ready Mining (aka Fly Fearless).
Meanwhile, New Order agents ensured Safety.
Tunnel Snakes are a menace.
Fly Fearless had a Snake infestation.
Every miner needs help.
They were about to get a lot of Assistance.
However, Safety isn’t free.
Next Time, on Part 52…
We’ve killed this one before.
Like all antigankers, DKslopoke is an AFK miner.
He is a certified permapleb.
He’s not any good at EvE Online.
He merely pretends to play.
DK begs to be spoonfed.
Without gankers, there is nobody to antigank. 🙁
So he begged Wrathful Hawk to play.
The antiganker desperately waited for content.
When would Hawk find a target?
Hawk explained that antiganking is boring.
It’s only for dumbdumbs.
However, DL was daydreaming about his previous Stormbringer.
Wow, he antiganked us hard.
Good times.
I guess he had fun?
Once again, DK sat on gate, waiting for hours.
Hawk worried DK would go AFK.
The boy has a reputation.
DK drank alone, while Hawk watched two movies.
Five hours later, Hawk found a target.
This is the private log of Captain Krig Povelli.
Recently, I came within 1,588m of a compressor.
Fleet chat was invigorating.
Suddenly, spaceships.
Plot Twist: I’m Krig Povelli.
I beat my own fleet at their own game.
There was no way to heal.
The ganker guy left no space.
This is what defeat looks like.
CONCORD just watched.
That fleet sucked.
Set up, hacked, and dunked.
Every fleet has winners and losers.
Aside from yours truly, this fleet was full of losers.
They decided to downgrade.
They also vowed revenge.
Will pirate kings save the miners?
Doubt.
I can’t wait for our next fleet!
Listening to: MEGASAFE
It happened last night.
Oof.
Then it happened again.
That’s truly amazing.
He’s too poor for simping.
He’s just a Highsec miner.
What a pleb.
Miners are to be euthanized, and not heard.
=BONUS CONTENT=
Hananeri Muvila released his AI generated album, with such hits as Safety, Mining, and Aiko Wormtongued My Orca.
Listening to: Shadow Hunter
Oh hi, ya, I live here.
Sort of like a place you might expect me.
This is what GPT says we do.
#1 alltime destroyer/battlecruiser/bomber ALLTIME CHAMPIONS
PewPEWpew – heavy flak from barski
Now that’s REAL PvP.
I’ll add him to the list.
2+8+3=1 Dead Orca
It’s never too late to repent.
They wonder why we gank them…
COMING SOON
In thirteen plus one day…
=THIS SUMMER=
4.91 = 4 + 9 + 1 = 13 + 1
4 + 2 + 2 + 2 + 4 = 13 + 1
We caught a war criminal, in EvE Online.
Guest Article
Hey, everybody, I’m Gallente Holostar, lead theorycraft design team lead for the Imperium.
Aiko made a map.
There are nine systems of interest: Torrinos, Ibura, Yoma, Oipo, Piak, Elonaya, Onnamon, Uuhulanen, and Uchomida. The miners congregate here and about. We have put a stop to all that, effective immediately. Come join us, as we continue our investigation.
*Facts and Evidence*
The miners use their Highsec wealth to rent in nullsec.
We hate Romania, so we started bumping.
Question: If Nagamac mines in Highsec, to pay rent in nullsec, what happens if he can’t mine in Highsec?
Just think about it.
Listening to: Snoop
Hot or not?
Hey there.
You know how I do.
Just Aiko things.
We especially love to grief newbros.
TrickyNicky started off as an antiganker’s miner.
I walked all over him.
Hey. If you can’t beat me, join me.
Well, he tried his best.
Wow, there you go!
Now that’s a neat trick, Nick!
Haha, we sure griefed that poor newbro streamer.
That’s how you play EvE Online.
When the miner’s in the belt
Drop it like it’s hot
Drop it like it’s hot
Drop it like it’s hot
When CONCRD try to get at you
Gank it like it’s hot
Gank it like it’s hot
Gank it like it’s hot
And if a freighter get a attitude
Pop it like it’s hot
Pop it like it’s hot
Pop it like it’s hotAnd I roll the best weed ’cause I got it going on
Uh! I’m a nice gal, with some nice dreams
See these Catalysts, see these Coercers?
High security, million isk boats
The interior like red
Killer with the beat, I know killers that are elite
You should think about it, take a secondI’m a gangsta, but y’all knew that
Da Big Boss B, yeah I had to do that
Ain’t no other way to play the game the way I play
I can’t fake it, just break it, and when I take it
See I specialize in making all the miners get safe
