Official Home of the New Order of Highsec
Calm down, miner.
Lena is big mad.
CCP is investigating.
Fortunately, I have a space attorney.
Icelandic law allows one (1) week for all dispute resolutions.
Maybe someday you’ll read about this on Reddit.
That’s right.
=BONUS KILLMAIL=
Farewell, Lena Jackyard!
We’ve met Barnso before.
TLDR
As you may recall, Hawk ganked him.
Tsk tsk.
He used this opportunity to review my CODE.
I don’t screenshot every isk.
After that, Hawk ganked him again!
PLOT TWIST: Barnso was on a secret Safety mission…
To be continued…
Listening to: Goodbye Venture
Hey there Venture enthusiasts.
It’s been a lot of fun!
We now conclude the December Doubles.
Each Venture in December was worth two (2) points.
One individual really doubled up!
DECEMBER SCORE
Wow, that’s amazing.
Who was the fattest Venture?
Wtf.
=BONUS ROUND=
Stay tuned! Next month is SUDDEN DEATH January. This is the perfect time to make a New Year’s ganking resolution.
PS: Send CASTOLE a few billion isk. He’s earned it.
Welcome to EvE Online, MrLentereng.
He pled not guilty.
He just needs a flight permit.
That’s right.
Happy to help the newbiewer.
Financial consultants are standing by.
I wonder how much isk he makes?
…can’t wait to meet him again.
Miners have a lot to say.
They have such fantasies.
What will a miner say next?
Well then…
I wish them all the best.
Cheerzah!
Listening to: Precious
EvE Online has some interesting characters.
Sometimes they go too far.
This is the story of Longtooth the Miner.
Hey there.
Normally, carebears use a Vexor.
He found me attractive.
Never trust a man who mines in Highsec.
He actually was a new player.
Barely eighteen years old…
Just another antisocial sociopathic CEO in EvE Online.
We soon learned a shocking truth…
This guy is a total pleb.
Just then, Good Girl Kara tried to stick up for me.
Oof!
Just a typical Highsec miner.
At least he’s not mad.
He’s just… not well in the head.
What a guy.
Cheerzah!
Miners often encounter gankers.
They especially notice me.
I am in the zone.
I try to give them what they want.
They like that.
Sometimes, they get a little upset.
They are frustrated with their lack of progress.
That’s fine with me.
I’m a princess.
Cya!
I’m a real Highsec escort.
That’s right.
Recently, miner Nigel ran into trouble.
He’s just a 2015 newbro.
So I agreed to assist.
I love to help the little guys.
Apparently, the mining pacifists lost a control tower?
No money? No problem!
Just send me your stuff.
It was his idea!
I’m glad we came to an agreement.
Cheerzah brav!
He just needs to pay.
That’s right.
There was just one problem.
I’ve done this before.
It works well.
I call it the 30 40 70 rule.
It works like a charm.
Later that day…
I change people’s lives!
There’s a life lesson here.
=FOLLOW UP=
Listening to: CASTOLE RADIO
It’s no secret.
We were in CODE, and they weren’t.
They were are mad at James 315.
I call them gankbears.
After James died, it was time to take out the trash.
So we got rid of Hrothgar Nilsson.
However, he made his own alliance, pretending to be us.
Like, for real bro.
James called them ‘former fans’.
[ 2017.03.24 22:58:46 ]
Hrothgar Nilsson > i’m about to go mining.
Hrothgar Nilsson > undocking in my mining ship. gank away.
Hrothgar Nilsson > these are not competing professions
Hrothgar Nilsson > the whole is greater than the sum of its part. Null-sec F1 monkey + agent, or miner + agent, or station trader + agent….. you get better at both by being both
Hrothgar Nilsson > i have successfully baited half a dozen concordokkens
Hrothgar runs a mining alliance.
Sad, but true.
Weird, but true.
So I accepted his challenge.
Doctor Zarkov > i made billions that is just a minoe drawback
AFK carebears aren’t real gankers.
They use their character bio as a blog?
xD
Gankbears just grind for isk.
I PvP for fun.
He didn’t want that pod anyways!
Here’s another Plebbo scout.
GF!
That’s right.
That’s right!
It’s that time of year.
We are here to help.
Without further ado, the November rankings…
As we head into December, CASTOLE generously motivates the other contestants, by adding an additional 25 billion isk to the PRIZE FUND. Wow, thank you CASTOLE! Remember, December is the month of kill doubling, so earn your BONUS points fast with that holiday spirit! It’s not too late to bounce back to the highest levels imaginable. This is your chance to become a TOP TIER elite Venture destroyer! Of course, if you can’t gank a Venture yourself, feel free to send isk to those who can!!
That’s right!
That’s right!
