Second Day of Christmas

With a little faith, you can double your Xmas pleasure.

HO HO HO!

Everyone is having a great time in EvE Online.

Ringlingdingalingringadingdingbing.

Antiganker alazarr spent years trying to buy every Catalyst in New Eden.

Sometimes, the best revenge takes a really long time.

Thanks for the free cats, bro!

There’s never been a better time to enlist.

Hey, this blog just writes itself.

Gosh, you guys are the greatest.

I really do appreciate it, and it does keep me going.

Ganking is neither easy, nor inexpensive.

Thank you, thank you, thank you!

Haha, very funny Wah Huren!

Miner Madness

I don’t pay much attention to miners.

However, the latest patch has triggered a wave of mewling.

I’m not sure what the fuss is about.

CCP has set an irrational precedent, allowing crybabies in Jita the delusion that anybody cares about them. Pro tip: nobody cares.

I spoke with an unironic Highsec miner.

What’s wrong miner?

Is this the end of AFK mining?

Will miners adapt to economic realities?

Two things are for certain.

Mining is boring, and miners are poors.

There’s no shame in quitting.

Miners need to focus on the big picture.

This is good news.

Is pulling CONCORD an exploit?

Multiple independent sources are confirming that CCP has been warning and/or banning people for “pulling” CONCORD. There has been speculation that this was “abnormal” pulling, and not the normal activity practiced routinely by gankers and antigankers for more than a decade. However, my sources have become increasingly clear that CCP is targeting gankers for routine pulling.

For example, the Novus Ordo antigankbears have been antiganking by pulling CONCORD into ice belts, to protect their Russian mining clients. Now it appears that gankers who counterpull are being warned for “delaying” CONCORD by drawing CONCORD out of the belt (because Novus Ordo is reporting them).

It is true, that pulling affects response times, but for more than a decade this has been normal gameplay. It was specifically allowed.

Are gankers no longer allowed to pull? Perhaps so, but if that is the case, there are going to be some significant changes.

I don’t know what to say.

I’ll just wait to see if CCP replies to my ticket.

Maybe everything is fine?

Fortunately, GM IceCream states it is ok to manipulate CONCORD to decrease (rather than increase) response times. Instead of pulling CONCORD away from the gate (to make it easier to gank on the gate), just pull CONCORD to the station (in order to make it harder to gank on the station). Problem solved!

Indeed, IceCream claims it is ok to spawn CONCORD in specific situations (provided that you do not intentionally reduce CONCORD response times), but as Jason notes, there is no possible scenario in which you can spawn CONCORD without simultaneously reducing response time elsewhere.

Troll me better

Hey there.

We are the most powerful alliance in the galaxy.

Trust is the most valuable commodity in EVE Online.

If you don’t believe me, this could be you.

Just calm down.

Yikes, never go full Ward.

Oof.

It’s just a game, until you are crying in local, two years later.

Haha, it’s funny.

What a crazy retard.

Like, for real.

I don’t even want to laugh at you.

I can’t help it though.

Here’s an official endorsement from CODE.

I’m still on the team.

That’s right.

Novus Plebo

I’ve heard that I am to blame for the collapse of CODE.

James 315 knows the truth. I tried to save the alliance, but he wanted to die, so we could move on.

My critics hail from another alliance, from a backwards whiteknight dimension, where the CODE. logo is not orange… but blue. These former fans praise their version of James, a boring gankbear named Hrothgar, who doesn’t even blog. Hrothgar left the New Order, but still craves the fame and the legacy. He uses the CODE. logo like a blue module, which he plagiarized to maximize his isk/hr.

Let me be clear. I left the CODE. alliance, because I saw no future in the alliance without James. In contrast, Hrothgar saw no future with James. His axis of autism is composed of salty former fans, who left CODE. before James quit blogging. They deleted their mining permits, and renounced James. Oh yes, they did.

I was recently checking for mining permits, when I stumbled across a counterfeit. Oh sure, it looks legitimate, but it doesn’t mention Aiko (or James). James loved me so much, that he wrote about my beauty and grace, but he forgot to mention either of us in this mining permit? Puh-leez. Here we witness a forgery.

Aiko Danuja > Why are you pretending to be CODE, with a blue James logo?
Darkside Tickler > you mention all these names…james…ets
Darkside Tickler > but i have no idea who that is
Aiko Danuja > Yeh, exactly…

So I killed the illegal miner.

Whadda was disgusted.

What kind of New Order agent would sell a permit for just 10 million isk, as if it’s some worthless piece of cheap trash?

Do you want proof that I’m the heiress to James 315?

Without a word from me, my alt’s alt can delete your fake permit, and sell the miner a permit that’s three times more valuable.

This is why James left me in charge, not you.

Cheers!

The Rat Story

People just want the story to be told.

Who am I to deny the will of the shareholders?

Honestly, uh…

Believe it or not, gankers aren’t into animal cruelty.

Grey, the problem isn’t that you killed a rat, or even that you tortured it to death. We’ve all made mistakes, right? The problem is that you are openly sharing this information, oblivious to social norms, without any hint of social awareness. According to the FBI, this lack of self-evaluation is an indicator of “extreme risk”. We don’t brag about torturing animals to death, in fact, it’s illegal in some regions.

The good news, is that Grey is currently too busy to be a serial killer, and he will have to wait a few years before he finally finds the time. As it turns out, according to the FBI, it’s normal for serial killers to wait until they are in their thirties.

Grey, this is not the first time that people have shown concern over your comments. Have you considered the possibility that you are a serial killer?

Some people just think it’s a little off.

Ya know?

Like, hello?????

Put the knife down buddy.

Of course, the real test for serial killer tendencies is to investigate whether they have a Hannibal Lecter style fascination with cuisine.

Donatien Alphonse Francois > how do you like your steak cooked?
CorrinoGiovanni > Ratty
Grey Ignis > rare if it’s a restaurant I trust, if not, medium rare. When I cook it at home I cook it rare, with an aromatic butter sauce and a pan sear. I made a 26oz ribeye not too long ago that I was very proud of. Made some roasted potatoes as a side with a salad and had some port wine with ice cream for dessert
Grey Ignis > So actually the other day I made this salmon, and I decided to try my hand a a glaze idea that I had, I took maple syrup, a bit of port, accent, a dash of cayenne, lemon juice, rock salt, and rosemary, and then seared the fuck out of the salmon and then added the glaze so it could caramelize in the sugar, then I added some pepper after the fact. I had a kale salad on the side with roasted asparagus
darklegionca > and a side of rat?
zxcxzx > i hear dog is pretty good
Sargon Of Amerish > I diddily ding dong do wish we could chat longer, but i’m having an old friend for diddily ding dong dinneroo!
Grey Ignis > In tems of snacks, I’m not gonna lie, a good oatmeal is always a banger. I add anise, allspice, cloves, cinnamon, mace, and nutmeg to mine. Chopped pears or apples go great, and adding milk is always good. Mhmm, and it’s good for you, great way to get protein and filling carbs that aren’t cheap
Jinx Beirutbomb > It sounds like torture makes you hungry.

Like real talk, uh…

For Shame

Some miners are displeased.

I have gone and done it.

Nowadays, James is the patron saint of carebears.

It’s funny to me.

I think he would have laughed.

It’s too bad he died.

Believe it or not…

…I wrote the CODE. long before James.

The most important part is the conclusion.

All miners must be destroyed.

That’s what James wanted, when I wrote the Code.

If you are reading this, you are already in orbit.

The Best

I’m the best.

I can shoot battlecruisers from my eyeballs.

Not surprisingly, I’m invincible, always!

For every winner, there is an equal and opposite loser.

Inpendius > these motherfuckers just attacked me in hisec for no fkn reason
Inpendius > FUCK YOU
Inpendius > I WASN’T RUNNING A MISSION, I WAS FLYING BACK TO MY HOME BASE, THEY JUMPED ME AT THE GATE IN OSMON
Kristine K0chanski > should use the jump drive thats what its for
Inpendius > STFU dumbass becuase im reporting them and this will go to court for real life consequences

When Inpendius discovered that Highsec is the arena of elite PvP, he ran away to nullsec, where he planned to crab in peace.

The thing about the CODE. which miners rarely understand, is we all came out of lowsec, nullsec, and various wormholes. In fact, we are still there. 

Shaftmaster Mastershafts needs no introduction, unless you are a pleb who has no idea who he is. Let’s just say that a mysterious line of communication stretches through Syndicate, transmitted via the secure comms of Northern Coalition, and directly into the blog of me, Princess Aiko, the Angel of Delve. 

Like most notaminers, Inpendius found all of this to be very amusing, and he vowed a sexual revenge. Furthermore, he felt quite calm.

Inpendius knew just what to say.

After some thought, he decided to add a little extra.

What is with miners and cancer?