Always! – Page 45 – ‎James 315 Space

Kiara Gone Wild, Part 3

Previously, in AikoSpace (that’s MySpace)… Kiara lost a Retriever, and a Drekavac. She didn’t like this, so she decided to investigate.

Karma Bad > pay Princess Aiko Danuja
Kiara Wildmann > thats a whore sorry but a whore and not a princess

Her investigation led to me, as all things do.

Kiara Wildmann > if that a princess than she would take care that this law link gets sprayed around the system

Kiara envisioned an alternative to Fozzie sov. What if one could claim space, simply by urinating on random bushes, trees, and metal poles? Regardless, Kiara claimed ignorance of existing game mechanics, and claimed immunity.

Kiara Wildmann > i hang here a week around in jita and i didnt read anything about that im local chat

Kiara spent a full week carefully reading the special offers in Jita, and not once did she hear anything about me, the Code, the New Order, or James 315.

Karma Bad > just do a google search
Kiara Wildmann > really?

Karma offered good advice, but Kiara wasn’t listening.

Kiara Wildmann > again
Kiara Wildmann > and again i say it
Kiara Wildmann > i didn´t know it
Kiara Wildmann > if i didnt know it that its exists so HOW i should google it?
Kiara Wildmann > explaine that
Kiara Wildmann > HOW
Kiara Wildmann > HOW i do that
Kiara Wildmann > i cant google something that i never heard about it or know it thats it exists right or wrong?

Like most miners, Kiara was not calm, and just wanted a Marshal.

Kiara Wildmann > what the fuck i want in highsec never was my goal i´m just in jita to buying a fucking marshal and flying back to minmatar what the fuck i want in your or They lovely fucking highsec?
Karma Bad > dunno
Kiara Wildmann > so explaine how i can google it if i dont know it?
Kiara Wildmann > two times i got ganked
Kiara Wildmann > so shooting down every player that didn´t know thats exists and cashing isk from that is fair or how i should understand you? they didnt contact me they just shooting me down zxc had a warp interupter so i could fly away so or so not whats the fucking big deal to hold me down and contact me?
Karma Bad > sounds about right
Kiara Wildmann > read it again
Karma Bad > correct
Kiara Wildmann > wheres the big deal to interupt my warp and contact me with a warning that i get shoot if i dont pay no interupt the warp shoot me down than say NOW YOU KNOW IT NOW PAY WOW thats great thats sounds fiar oh sorry concord is my problem?
Kiara Wildmann > contact first he will see it if the player or bot are about to warp and interupt it than shoot it down so again or should we stop now? how can a player that he doesnt know that the law link exists goggle it?
Karma Bad > Code is always accepting more enforcers, to help spread the word, if you believe there should be a different way.

Miners can’t become gankers, they are psychologically incapable. However, as a courtesy, we always offer the opportunity.

Karma Bad > but…. it also sounds like you dont like aiko
Karma Bad > so….

Liking me, like like liking me, is absolutely required by law.

Kiara Wildmann > i dont like her how she act with now you know it now pay no one cames to me and tells me theres a law link nobody here in jita and around of jita so basicly i dont know it explain how i should know it if the big list of players here to spread the word i DONT pay that why i should pay for someting that i didnt know?
Karma Bad > ….
Kiara Wildmann > its not my fault that your playerbase to lazy to spread the word i´m not unwilling but explain why i should pay for something i didnt know you would pay for a visit store after to want to get out of the store and the storeowner tells you you have to payed the entry? what fines?
Karma Bad > there are fines
Kiara Wildmann > what thats means
Karma Bad > its just to bring you into compliance
Kiara Wildmann > would you pay the price to enter a store after you wants to leave this store? fact you didnt know you have to pay the enter price after leaving so explain what we do? i dont pay something nobody explains nobody calls it and i dont mean eve i mean a fucking regular store world wide in every city but i´m not unwilling sounds just not fair for a new player
Karma Bad > its just the law

Karma wanted to help, but Kiara was uncivilized.

Kiara Wildmann > dont go this way i´m not trying to break a law, i cant break a law if i dont know it! we had that point already noone cames to me and explains that nobody gave me the information about that link we had that point thats impossible to google something if the person dont know it now you come with trying to break the law
Karma Bad > yea
Kiara Wildmann > you offered me your help your asking me if you can help so explain i´m not unwilling but that price is for not knowing anything really unfair
Karma Bad > Aiko is the ruler of all

Karma decided to focus on basic facts.

Karma Bad > you have to take it directly to aiko and beg her forgiveness
Kiara Wildmann > no no i´m not begging í´m not unwilling but i will not begging i want refund my retriever i´m willing to pay 300.000.000isk and i will no longer mining around jita but for that i want my retriever and my peace i leaving jita to and travel back to my home location i pay the isk i called but i want my peace and my retriever
Karma Bad > send it to the princess

Did you catch that?

i´m willing to pay 300.000.000isk

To be continued…

Pretty!

Alt 00 has painted another beautiful portrait.

As always, I’m looking good!

James observed, “When you’re a member of the New Order family, life in highsec is like a nonstop party–the most amazing, wonderful party you’ll ever experience.”

I’m a member in good standing, and I’m having a great time!

Believe it or not, we even have our own website.

Everybody seems to love me.

I’m doing well, by doing great!

I’m also into vore. That’s Japanese hentai about little tiny people who get eaten by beautiful women. Miners are gross, but I get hungry.

I digest all their little mining bits, converting them into neutron blasters and magnetic field stabilizers. That’s the circle of life.

Of course, some miners don’t want to be eaten. They try to squirm, kick and scream, but there is no way to avoid destiny.

I’m always right, and I always win.

I’m invincible.

That’s right!

Happy Aiko Day

People were hoping today, of all days, to hear from dear James.

Alas, he ‘won’, and you know what that means.

Some even say he is dead.

Those who know me, are aware I took all of this rather hard. I loved the CODE. more than perhaps anyone, even more than James. Without the CODE, I have no desire to play EVE, yet the alliance died. Some say it died in 2018, or 2016, or 2014. James kept it limping along, despite many difficulties, until even he stopped.

I winced when I read this. Today in Halaima, there were more than twenty Orcas, and a dozen skiffs. That’s not victory, and no spin will change the facts. Carebears are not even close to compliant, and far from “intermittent pockets of resistance”, the reality is that nearly all of Highsec is oblivious to the CODE. EVE is becoming more, not less, of a theme park. The only real victory we can point at is the fact that some of us are still here, still going, even without James or the legendary heroes of days gone by.

Well, yah. Is that so hard to understand?

I can’t ignore the steadfast devotion of Aaaarrgg, a few bitter-enders who log in occasionally, and some guys in nullsec (who are frankly pretty damn good at the game, but will likely rejoin Silent Company in a few months). However, the rest of us recognize the need for a future without James. We aren’t ready to ‘win’.

Some miners were ‘outraged’ when I decided enough was enough. How dare I move on? How could I betray the great and wonderful legacy of His Holy Grand High Excellency, James 315? At long last, have I no decency?

Most ‘agents’ left the alliance long before me, or were never part of it.

They criticize me, but what have they done for the CODE?

It’s not my fault the Minerbumping channel died. James chose the moderators there, as one of them repeatedly reminded us, and someone made an asinine decision. When you ban the most active members of your alliance, it’s already over.

Listen carefully, and you can still hear whispers…

Starfox told us how to know if James is gone.

It’s been a full year, and we can admit reality. James quit. If he wants to undock, that’d be great. If he wants to blog, that’d be wonderful. To be quite honest, I’m kind of sick of it all. I might fuck off to lowsec, or go live in a wormhole, or just start doing something else. I doubt, I hope not, that I’m still doing this in eight years.

I’d like to believe that Highsec ganking will continue to be part of EVE. That even without me, someone somewhere will take the time to screenshot stupid miners, and post their lamentations. I’d like to read about it.

James 315 was a big deal, back in the day, and I’ve been truly flattered that so many people support me, with kind words and generous isk. There’s even a theory, which may or may not be true, that actually James was Aiko all along.

Which would make me the Mittani…

Regardless, I appreciate all the support from friends, family, and fans.

I don’t know when I will quit, but I certainly will. I thought about quitting back in 2018, and again in 2019, and three times in 2020. I thought about quitting today, I could just declare victory! However, a few people decided that today is henceforth known as Aiko Day. I just can’t quit on Aiko Day…

When I die, and I definitely will, I will try to give the alliance to someone. I’d hate to see it dwindle into obscurity, and I understand that it’s impossible to recruit anyone into a stagnant alliance with AFK leadership.

Of course, some people are concerned. They worry about poor old James, and his feelings. I sincerely doubt James disagrees with anything I’ve done, or said, but maybe he thinks that meanie Aiko is bullying at him. Ok, maybe a little…

Let me be clear. James played far longer than I want to, and blogged way more than I intend to. His writing motivated me, and the CODE. alliance was my sole interest. Unlike most agents, there is no secret nullbear mining ‘main’ behind Aiko. I just love killing miners. Through James, I was inspired by the Sheikh and the VCBees, by Helicity and the Hulkageddon. We might disagree about who is saving Highsec, but I don’t think we actually do. It’s the gankers and the baiters, and yes the bumpers and doublers, people who do something. They are the best people in New Eden.

I suppose imitation is the most sincere flattery.

I think Arrendis hates me more than James, so I’m doing something right.

I’m not afraid to say it.

In fact, on this first Aiko Day, I’m going to amend the Code, with an official Second Amendment. Yes, it will now be explicitly LEGAL for miners to praise James ad nauseam. May their praises reach Hek, where perhaps he will awaken from eternal slumber, and decide to actually undock. Until that time, I’m gonna stay nice and SAFE, in my own little alliance where I can click buttons and avoid super roleplay.

Victory!

Gunkers

Miners think they have it all figured out.

They say we are the bad guys.

Those poor miners, shot down while mining their buisness.

They don’t like the Code.

What would we do without it?

One thing is for certain.

The gunkers are out there.

Be careful!

Another one

I meet a lot of cool people in EVE.

We tend to get along pretty well.

They understand the law.

Recently, I saw a Retriever.

It was mining, so I put a stop to that nonsense.

Local miners were confused, maybe I’m from lowsec?

Fortunately, a local Goonbear was there to explain.

I’m just a bad apple.

So I did what I had to do.

I’m here to help!

The Best Revenge, Part 98

The Best Revenge, Part 1
The Best Revenge, Part 78

Previously, in Aiko’s EVE… One year ago, the Second Great War began with the vile duplicity of the Double Trader, Vily. All of this was anticipated by avia naali (aka aiva naali), a Highsec Orca pilot who vaulted to the highest ranks of Goonswarm.

Fortunately for the Swarm, Grandübergroßführer ‘lil Bullet anticipated the outbreak of hostilities, and was prepared for a two-front war.

avia ordered a series of sharp counterattacks to cover his withdrawal from Geminite. As always, Princess Aiko served as his personal liaison with the rest of Goonswarm, keeping him advised on every development.

Together, they conspired to foment civil war, between Pandemic Horde and Pandemic Legion. From time to time, the Mittani would encrypt hidden messages inside a public address, personally communicating with his overlord, avia.

While mining in Kamio, avia swept TEST from their staging regines, cutting off reinforcements. Subsequently, he began systematically shreading enemy structures. He also decided to purchase a personal command rorqual, toyed with a plan to bankrupt Perimeter Tranquility Trading Tower, and he applied to Karmafleet University.

When Princess Aiko was unavailable, Slackbot served as a trusted confidant, and was even given direct command of the Stain counteroffensive.

avia also nurtured the Homefront, employing cargo expanded Charons to rapidly move ore from “the box”, where heroic full digg speed rorquals conducted mining with the same vigour as any frontline soldier.

avia’s glorious counteroffensive blunted the enemy advance, but the front gradually stabilized, and Goonswarm was forced unto the defensive. Nevertheless, avia was a brilliant strategist, rallying the Swarm behind a wall of cynbo jams.

Meanwhile, he nervously eyed his application to Karmafleet.

It was time to pay his dues.

Even the leader of Goonswarm has to pay taxes.

To be continued…

Merry Juneteenth!

It’s that festive time of year.

Everyone is celebrating.

We are all getting that magical Juneteenth spirit.

Did you know that slavery is legal in New Eden?

I’m a Khanidess.

We believe in traditional values, unlike the fascist Caldari state.

The mining caste must be extirpated.

We will kill them all.

It’s only fair.

Be well!

Hating on Haters

HateLesS apparently hates me. He’s been claiming I declared a crusade against streamers! This isn’t true at all. The Sheikh declared Jihadswarm long before I was born, and I’m merely His divine messenger, borne on the wings of the VCBees.

We don’t believe that miners, like HateLesS, are entitled to free easy boring quick MindLesS isk. Don’t brag about how much isk/hr you make, and then demand CCP make it easier. Welcome to EVE. We are your challenge.

HateLesS says that we are griefers, evil space bullies who just want to make him angry. Look, HateLesS, we don’t care how you react. We are just here to play the game, and normal gameplay is not ‘griefing’. You can cry, or not cry, we are gonna come anyways. That’s not abuse, it’s fair competitive play.

EVE is a wargame, and we are allowed to harass and demoralize you. If this makes someone quit the game, that’s great. We call that winning.

I’m most motivated by “I don’t care” miners, who care so little that they AFK daily. They have a bad attitude, and it’s my duty to antigank them.

We are knights of the New Order, sworn to defend Highsec and ensure it isn’t overrun by bot-aspirant isk-efficient repetitive grinding farmers.

We want a better game, more complicated than blobbing together and blapping defenseless triangles. You might not like it, but we are here to help.

I don’t shoot miners because it’s funny, for isk, or because I have some roleplay sentiment. I don’t do it for a dusty old essay, or some guy who died years ago. I do it for one very simple reason. I don’t like miners, in real life.

I’ve despised basically every video game ever, with their guides and walkthroughs and meta-strategies and canalized rote content. EVE offers something unique, unlike anything else. CCP can introduce all the stale PvE content they want, and it won’t change a thing, because PvP players will ensure that miners burn.

PvE streams don’t draw new players. People just conclude, “Wow, EVE is incredibly boring.” The only interesting moment is when we show up.

HateLesS, calm down… miner.

Ultimately, EVE is a game of cat and mouse. CCP has placed cheese, to entice you poors. Don’t act surprised when you encounter cats.

Cheers!

The Best Revenge, Part 97

The Best Revenge, Part 1
The Best Revenge, Part 78

Previously, in Aikotopia… Highsec miner anaCheeya ANARKY lost his Orca, and fell into a CODE. rabbit hole. Before long, he was living a life of intrigue and danger, securing an ironclad grip upon the mighty Goonswarm Federation. He also changed his name, several times, before settling upon avia naali (aka aiva naali).

Within the elite Goonswarm Führerbunker, somewhere outside of 1DQ, avia held court with his most trusted assistant, Princess Aiko.

Together, they prepared to accept the humiliating surrender of that whore, Elise Randolph, who would be imprisoned in Kamio.

Elise would spend the rest of her miserable days as a mining Tayra, desperately scrounging for Veldspar in Kamio ~~IV’s belt 4~~ III’s belt 1.

When avia noticed that the Minerbumping blog was dead, Princess Aiko explained that it was all part of the plan.

Meanwhile, avia developed his own plans, for combat can flipping.

He continued to serve as Chairman of the Delve Racing League.

As always, avia developed Goonswarm’s most elite doctrines.

Sometimes, avia wondered if Aiko was listening. Oh, there she is!

A two front war was imminent, and avia ordered Goonswarm to teir 6.

Channeling Sun Tzu, avia masterminded the entire course of the war. Goonswarm would withdraw, abandoning the floodplains and unreal Delve, allowing the enemy to exhaust themselves on skanktrap Keepstar timers. Only then, over a year later, would the Swarm finally begin to counter break.