Agents – Page 5 – ‎James 315 Space

Code Ready Gelhan, Part 52

Listening to: Get Well Soon

Code Ready Gelhan, Part 1

Code Ready Gelhan, Part 51

It was the most expensive ship xAtlas42x ever lost.

This made it difficult to fly fearless.

Mission Ready Mining had a real mining problem.

New players were quitting the game, due to endless boredom.

However, Assistance Group was determined to help.

Just in time, Kurisa finished her eyeshadow.

It was time to play EvE Online.

Kurisa, aka Kalorned, is a certified mining instructor.

This time, the Tunnel Snakes won.

This was before my time.

Slayer got slayed, and his own alliance mocked him.

Gandaulf ~~the~~ DeGrey is no longer laughing.

CCP was gonna need to patch the game.

Meanwhile, the biggest corporation in Highsec enjoyed rapid growth.

Hundreds of newbros were joining!

The alliance grew twenty percent in four months.

That was the start of a long slow decline.

Things were about to get worse.

To be continued…

uh oh spaghettio…

Krig’s Korner, Episode 19

Krig’s Korner, Episode 18

Welcome to the Krig Povelli show.

This miner was quite calm.

Sorry ladies…

I finally got what I want.

I rammed this miner good.

He loved it.

I just had one more request.

I wanted him to leave.

I also wanted to heal the game.

Furthermore, he needs a mining permit.

Eventually, he noticed my superior social standing.

This really triggered him.

Eventually, we parted ways.

I’m glad we met.

Thanks for the memories!

Absolute Failures, Part II

Listening to: Dental Plan

Absolute Failures, Part 1

The Second Battle of Torrinos began with a bang.

Envoy Arby > WISH I HAD BACKUP
Aiko Danuja > are u asking me to come to torrinos?
Envoy Arby > YA
Envoy Arby > THEY ARE NAZIS
Envoy Arby > THEY LOVE HITLER
Aiko Danuja > Kill: RossRed (Mackinaw)
Envoy Arby > hahaha
Envoy Arby > U KILLED THAT NAZI
Aiko Danuja > BACK TO BERLIN
Envoy Arby > TAK TAK DOBRE

Triple Commissar Centurion RossRed exploded.

It was a surprise inspection.

Absolute Trash alliance declared a State of Griefing.

Lieutenant Comrade Ihamori Isu was still alive.

He contacted random people to chat.

Ok buddy, sounds great!

The defense fleet was led by Lt.Cmsr valfurian saraki.

He is a Toltec paladin for TRUMP, and an experienced failganker.

Well, you can’t win every fight.

[ 2024.09.15 17:59:19 ] Thaicylias > that was fun

The fleet was dying.

Bystanders were amazed, as bot Mackinaws kept mining.

Even invincible Ihamori died.

Advo was uncloaked, and tryhard Kinhard lost a second Ferox.

It was an absolute disaster.

ABSOD discord was abuzz with confusion (and bemused spies).

It was not a good fight.

Triple Commissar Centurion Striknor was frustrated.

Meanwhile, valfurian joined a new fleet.

It was a veldspar fleet in Ibura, adjacent to Torrinos.

valfurian was happy to find a chill fleet in Lonetrek.

Of course, he’d never met April before.

Nevertheless, valfurian vowed revenge.

However, something went awry…

Uh oh!

Those darn gaunkers jumped the gate!

Teamwork makes the Dreamwork.

I tried to help him.

He was too busy.

valfurian failed again.

valfurian will never be safe.

He will never ever ride that Happy Hooker again.

Sad!

Another win for Team Aiko.

Congratulations all around.

=THE END=

Absolute Failures

The First Battle of Torrinos

The Second Battle of Torrinos began in Uchomida.

A Klingon yellowboxed us without provocation.

Things went too far.

Whups.

What an absolute failure.

Just wait until tomorrow.

Oh, it’s gonna go very well.

The target moved to Torrinos.

Wow, just wow.

To be continued…

Notaminer

Notaminers are a popular class in EvE Online.

They are all liars.

Nobody likes a miner.

Nobody wants to be a miner.

Don’t mine in highsec.

Don’t mine anything.

Don’t never ever mine.

Once a miner, always a miner.

Miners suck.

I think all miners are bots.

Absolute Racism

Listening to: AO Downfall

Trigger Warning: Blatant Racism in EvE Online

Hey there.

We’ve all heard the rumors.

Absolute Order is absolutely racist.

These are real screenshots from EvE Online.

Oh wow, ok.

See what I mean?

We have no tolerance for casual breakfast Klingons.

They cannot be reasoned with.

It’s not just the racism.

Absolute Order is absolutely mental.

We know how to deal with this.

Just bump them all.

Governor Lee done goofed.

Consequences will never be the same.

We’ve met before.

Haven’t we Mr Governor Lee?

That’s right.

We go way back.

Wayback.

What will MrLee think of next?

Good Girl Bot Killers

That’s right.

Good Girl Kara > Kill: Uedashin Unata Eto (Worm) reporting them does nothing
Vardonis > Good Girl Kara what did you report for?
Good Girl Kara > botting
Vardonis > abyss botting?
Good Girl Kara > yep
Good Girl Kara > Kill: Onaneri Irai Hinken (Worm) another one

My alliance provides a community service.

Twenty eight Worms down.

35 bots permabanned (or given a slap on the wrist as usual).

Does CCP care about bots?

=DOUBLE FEATURE=

Are mining permits real?

With his new permit, Nick was celebrating in local.

This caught the attention of fellow newbro Vyacheslav.

I call that real content, with real permits.

End of an Era, Part 17

End of an Era, Part 16

It was a rainy day in Incursion Town.

The roads were infested with rats.

Editor’s Note: The original design of incursions, developed by developers who no longer develop the game, was for players to race through a maze of tunnels filled with scary space monsters… whoever made it first, could fight the BIG BOSS MOTHERSHIP for isk and glory.